8. The Low Bar

Quick rant.

How hard is it to get a reply in a timely manner? Or actually get asked out on a date?

Or not to be left hanging on a dating app for days waiting for a response? Or to not be hit with the worst one liners known to man (here's one I just had come in via Tinder - Did you just fart? Because you've blown me away' I mean just WOW )

I fucking hate this generation of dating, all of the above apply and it just leaves you feeling shit.

The bar is so low its basically a fucking trotting pole at this point - not a nice new one either, a rotted old one full of chips and woodworms. I want to take said pole and batter the living crap out of these man children!!!

I have no patience left - ask me out within a couple of days or I will just lose interest. I know I know I could be the one to ask, but that never works out well, you tend to end up being the one chasing them and I have done enough of that bullshit to last a god dam life time.

You may recall my first blog post about the piece of shit I gave far too much of my time and energy to, that is not happening again. On that note I found out he was married the other day - not that I am in the least bit surprised at this, I had my suspicions because the deception of that man knows no bounds. He has obviously been creeping around my socials as he came up on 'people you may know' so of course I had to have a nosy and it didn't take me long to land on his now wife's FB page. Poor cow.

This time of year sucks a bit when you're single, I can't deny it. I mean I should be used to it by now, its the 8th Christmas I have spent alone (get out the tiny violins 🎻).

I would just like that special someone to buy me presents and bring me champagne in bed, surely not too much to ask for? It appears I can't even get asked out on a first date so the chances of that happening are about as likely as Henry Cavill popping down my chimney in his birthday suit (or dressed as Geralt, I'll take either)

I am in awe of these people who just seem to magically fall into relationships, they make it look effortless, whereas I feel like I'm flailing around in quicksand. What is the secret??

Are all these people just settling for absolute steaming turds of relationships because they are scared to be alone? Or are they just the lucky ones?

I recently went to York on a solo trip and it was possibly the worst time of year to do this - Christmas, Couples everywhere. I felt like a leper. I enjoyed it but at the same time a sadness set in. This was the first time I had taken a trip alone so I am hopeful the more I do it the better it will get.

I just need to remember who the fuck I am and that I am single because I choose to be, if I wanted a below par partner I could go out and get one tomorrow, but why in the name of Satan would I want to inflict that upon myself?

I also need to remind myself that all these insta pics and social media posts are complete bullshit and not a true representation of peoples lives, wouldn't it be much more entertaining if people posted what was really going on (that's a social media platform I'd sign up for) imagine the absolute carnage that would ensue 😂

I guess at least I can sleep soundly at night in my comfy as shit king size bed, safe in the knowledge that I am not being cheated on, the toilet seat is where I left it (sans piss) and the latest tv series I am binge watching is paused undisturbed awaiting my glorious return.

Blessed Yule tidings to you all. Watch out for those Exes, tis the season.